In yoga, there's a concept known as "releasing into." It's what we aim to do when we get into poses that are uncomfortable. We focus on breathing and "send the breath" to the places we feel tension and discomfort whilst trying to settle in beyond the resistance. We can apply this same concept to our lives.
My mom read this excerpt from the children’s book The Velveteen Rabbit at my grandma’s funeral: “Real isn't how you are made,” said the Skin Horse. “It's a thing that happens to you… You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand.”